Korean dating: first stunner pull and internal barriers dissolve
One of the key experiences I had in Korean dating was a game-changing date I had with racing model. The year was 2012 and I saw her at the Busan racing expo a week prior to cold approaching her in the street and getting her number. It was the first time on a date with such an attractive girl by Korean standards that even had a degree of fame and social status. I was excited about the date and a little surprised that I was able to meet someone of this degree of hotness and fame off of cold approach. At that point in my Korean dating life, I was hooking up with cute chicks from time to time and felt the urge to go for what I felt was out of my reach. She showed up on the date enthusiastic and was even flirtier than most other girls that I went on a date with. Things went well and I pulled her to my place. I got very nervous when she was in my house and I was actually a bit confused, how could a girl this hot just come right in my house and flirt with me like this? She was forcing me to question my own identity and what my value is or what I’m indeed capable of. I didn’t feel entitled to this girl, yet she was here in my room. I ended up playing some guitar, watching some YouTube videos, having some drinks and a long chat with her trying to entertain her and enjoying her angelic presence. She was giving me looks of pure feminine energy and there was sexual tension as if something may happen, but it didn’t. I was getting last minute anxiety. Last minute anxiety (LMA) is like the male version of Last minute resistance where you block sex from happening due to your own nerves, insecurities, lack of entitlement, fear of loss, scarcity mindset, etc. After about 2 hours or so in my house, she said she had to go so I walked her to her car. She seemed even slightly disappointed and said “See you next time.”
As I went home I had a severe feeling of regret and disappointment that I froze up and failed to make a move. I went back to my room and attempted to process the whole experience. I realized that just like other girls I dated, she showed up for the date…came into my house and enjoyed the experience we were creating together. I realized that I am entitled to approach any girl and enough for any girl no matter how hot. She was just another person and enjoyed the experience I provided but I had back giving her the full experience! I had barriers in my own mind about what I deserve, what I am entitled to, and a self imposed gap between me and hot girls. I realized the gap was of own making and false, and I saw the world and hot girls as not above or below me but equals with me..just another person born into a female body. I also realized that no matter what, you need to make a move in isolation when you have the chance. Waiting and delaying sexual advances was just hiding my intent and not playing to win. I was hoping not to lose her and afraid to cross the barrier of sexual intent. By being afraid to lose her and not acting on my intent, I actually lost the chance I had manifested. Weaseling around and not confidently escalating while calibrating to her emotional state and reaction in the situation repels girls. She went on to text back two or three times and was busy with her photo shoots and then eventually ghosted.
This experience changed me forever, I now saw all girls as within my range of entitlement and as normal people who may be interested in a good experience or relationship with me! I also learned that no matter what, it’s important to take the shot sexually when you have the chance! With hot girls (or any girls for that matter), second shots are never guaranteed, and putting off escalation due to fear of loss or doing it “smoothly” does no one any good! In a busy city with lots of stimulus, entertainment, dating options, social/familial obligations, overtime and company dinners, you take the shot on goal when it is presented! In the next year I went on to pull models, Miss Korea contestants, and date Miss University Korea winner in the city I was in. Korean dating can be tough to crack, but with persistence and adjustments you won’t need to settle for the bottom of the barrel 😉 Join the Facebook group for more information on meetups and to get your questions about Korean dating answered!